fuzzy L0G1c

Amy gives us our topic this week: (okay last week, but you know how I roll by now)  

1. What is your favorite word?
   • “Moist”
2. What is your least favorite word?
   • “Dude” when uttered by anyone over 10 years old. 
   • Or any form of fake-swearing. “Fetch!, Shite!, Mother Trucker!, ect..”  News Flash, you are still cursing if you mispronouce it or not. (oh I feel a post coming on)
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? 
   • I’m an idiot for anyone I think might actually like being around me. 
   • Yes, I’m needy.
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
   • Racism.  I mean, c’mon.  It’s 2008.
5. What sound or noise do you love?
   • The gentle warm sigh of a well-satisfied woman.
     • Typically heard after taking out the trash, killing a spider or admitting I’m wrong.
6. What sound or noise do you hate?
   • Nagging
7. What is your favorite curse word?
   • Oh Fuck.. I can’t decide on shit like this.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
   • Mongolian BBQ Chef.
9. What profession would you not like to do?
   • Anything involving poo.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
    • “Lets see here… Some minor sins here and there.  You were smart-ass most your life, but you didn’t do anything too serious.  You were a good husband, a good father and were honest in all your dealings.  You scored an 8.3 outta 10.  Okay, you squeak by.”

So I’m reading CNN today and come across this “shocker” of a story:

Sources: No air marshals on most flights

Seriously?  Are we surprised by this?  I think the entire program was designed to make Granny, who is taking her first-ever flight from Kansas City to Dallas, feel safe from the evil terrorists.  But seriously, do we really think it’s a good idea for a highly-trained, highly-paid federal marshal to sit on that flight?  Are we seriously protecting against the infinitesimal probability that something serious might go down?  C’mon.

The program should persist on higher-risk flights.  A “Beware of Dog” sign does indeed serve a purpose.  However we shouldn’t shit our pants when we discover that operationally it’s unrealistic and a complete waste of $$$ to protect the majority of flights.  Can we please get over ourselves?

Playing catch-up on Project Say Something again.  This question / theme comes from Kim.

“We’ve all done stupid things in our lives. (Don’t deny it, you were a teenager once too!) What’s one of the stupidest things you’ve ever done? Tell us all about it! (Or if you’re like me and have a ginormous LIST of them, just pick a few )”

Oh my.. So many to choose from…

When I was about 8 years old I was fighting off imaginary ninjas in my backyard. (You know.. Like you do) My weapon of choice was a bicycle chain lock.  You know the kind from back in the 80’s.  Tiny little chain wrapped in some neon-colored soft-plastic sleeve with a tubular combonation lock at the end?  Yeah - that’s the one.  Well unbeknownst to many is that these chains are the bane of all imaginary ninjas and as such, I was using it to bring down justice upon the vile ninjas. 

The battle had reached a fevered pitch when one of the most vile ninjas ducked behind a fence post.  Not to stopped by this show of ninjaly cowardness, I swung my ninja-bane bicycle chain with all the rightgeous force I could summon.  The Cowardly Ninja sneered at me as chain pasted right through his imaginary body swung around the pole and impacted with my skull.  I can still clearly remember the feeling of the lock impacting right above my left ear.  I don’t remember much after that except laying on the ground, throwing up…

Real smart…

“Other Kim” asks us this (read: last) week “How (insert band name / artist) changed my life”. This one kinda stumped me. As I can’t, per say, say that any band, group of bands or particular artist caused a significant change in my life. As our good mysterious friend “Sirj” could verify. I love music but pay very little attention to the band itself. I suppose it’s like enjoying a painting and really not giving a damn who painted it. I can’t decide if that’s a good thing or not, it’s just how I am, really. To add further smoke to the mirrors, I don’t really have a genre that I’m solely devoted to. I like music from Green Day and Coldplay. I like music from The Beatles and Oingo Boingo. I like musicals and showtunes (yeah, insert your own joke here…. and there) I like music from Pink and Pink Floyd. But I can probably only name a few of the artists themselves. So I can’t contribute any significant change in my life to a particular band.However If I may borrow some from the movie “High Fidelity” I do look back on my life and can catelogue large portions by the music I was obsessed with at the time. Perhaps the music I was listening did have a influence on me, or maybe I just recall it in the same way I would recall the soundtrack to a movie. Here are some of the highlights:

Meatloaf - (Album) Bat out of Hell 2 - This is the soundtrack of the summer of my first “real girlfriend” and the lovely experiences and awkwardness which went along with my adventures with “Nadia”. <sigh>

Oingo Boingo - (Song) Pedestrian Wolves - This song was on the radio when my friend (Justin) and I were jumped by wanna-be gang bangers outside a Movie Theater. Ironically enough.

Green Day - (Album) American Idiot - Soundtrack to the summer before we moved away from “home”. Filled with uncertainty about my future. Angry at a world I was powerless to change.

Rocky Horror Picture Show (soundtrack) - Countless long fishing trips with my friend Justin. Just picture me and my buddy, driving up to the Unitahs, singing RHPS at the top of our lungs, in a rusted-to-hell 1979 Chevy “luv”over and over again. Yes, I’m serious. To this day I marvel that we didn’t end up… well… anyhow. We didnt!

Candlebox - (album) You - DCI Tour w/ the Casper Troopers, 1994.

Pink Floyd - (album) Division Bell - DCI tour w/ Casper Troopers, 1995. Torrent, on the road, love affair w/ the love of my life, Amber.

Pink Floyd - (album) Final Cut - The album I wallowed in after breaking up with Amber in 1995. That album still depresses the shit out of me.

Moby - (song) Everloving - The song which was playing when both of my children were born.

The list goes on.. but it should give you the idea. I think I’ve got a pretty good soundtrack, but I can’t contribute any one change to one song, album or band.