Archive for October, 2008
She Purrs Like a Kitten and Roars Like a Lion
by Shane on Oct.30, 2008, under Project Say Something
Kim asked: “What’s your Dream Car?” (Or something like that – it’s been too long for me to still find!)
This one is easy for me. Regardless my nagging “Daddy Issues” one thing I can always say is that I respect his taste in vehicles. My dream car is my dad’s 68 Mercury Cougar. I’ve lusted after this car since I can remember. One of my fondest memories is riding w/ my dad in Wyoming (Just outside the Uintah Mountains) doing at least 130 mph in this baby. When accelerating this car will just glue you to the back of your seat. Awesome!
Error: Funny Title Not Found. Retry?
by Shane on Oct.30, 2008, under Project Say Something
“Other Kim” asked: Tell us about at least one religion, other than your own, you respect and why.
For me it’s not about “who’s team” you are on. It’s not about saying I’m religion A and we are super awesome compared to religion B. There’s a great Mel Brooks line / song about a time before there were countries and everyone was still living in caves. The national anthem of his cave was “Let them all go to hell, except Cave 76!” I think that’s true for anyone who thinks their religion is the best. In this case, exchange “Cave 76″ for whatever religion you like. So to say I respect an entire religion would be inaccurate and somewhat shortsighted.
No religion has a monopoly on good people (or idiots for that matter). I admire the good people who are scattered across many faiths (non-faiths as well). Those who seek help others – even when it’s not in their best interest. People who take time to help even when no one is watching. People who think of others before they think of themselves. These qualities are not isolated to just one religion.
Take this as a cop-out if you like. But concerning religion, I’m much more interested in what’s in their heart and what motivates them vs. the name on the side of the building where they worship.
Pumpkin Eater
by Shane on Oct.29, 2008, under Project Say Something
A while back, Amy set a theme to follow up on my theme about cheating. She asks:
If you were going to cheat, with what celebrity/famous person (ONLY) would it be?
Well okay if you twist my arm. I’ve ALWAYS been a sucker for redheads. So if I had to (and you know it would be TOTALLY against my will) I’d have to call up Alicia Witt. I originally feel in love with her when she played a guest role on The Sopranos episode “D-Girl”. (She was the hot redhead producer who eventually slept with Christopher). Anyway – it’s her. She needs more work. Someone hire her so I can lust after her some more!
Random Predictability
by Shane on Oct.28, 2008, under Shane's Posts
Somehow along the way Amy and I got into the “tradition” of sending random IM’s to each other from time-to-time. Figured I’d share a few of the highlights to get me back into the mood of writing. Enjoy…
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
Amy: hey, have we received a topic this week?
Shane: Stop reading my mind!
Shane: Witch! Witch!
Amy: ROFL
Shane: Isn’t it “Other Kim’s” turn?
Amy: You crack me up….seriously. I should just random IM you every morning
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
Shane: Did you see the size of that Ape! Holy cow!
Amy: it’s not an Ape, its a monkey
Amy: it has a tail!
Shane: shoot!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Amy: Tartar Sauce Batman! The joker’s got a fancy umbrella and a herd of wild lemurs!
Shane: that’s so hat.
Shane: err hot
Shane: LOL
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Shane: I never put a finger on that donkey!
Amy: but it was more a matter of where that bothered me
Shane: indeed
Monday, September 22, 2008
Amy: Have you got your tickets to the gun show?
Shane: they came free with my Republican Party membership
Amy: damn!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Amy: who the hell is Maxwell?
Amy: and maybe he is not free because he used his silver hammer
Amy: whacked the shit out of people
Shane: bingo
Amy: ROFL…and you were thinking I was some kind of idiot for a second huh?
Shane: no – but I was surprised.
Amy: all part of my randomness
Shane: I was listening to that on my way in this morning – got stuck in my brain
Amy: it would do
Amy: so was my question lame?
Shane: I’ve not seen it yet. <ducks>
Amy: what?! damn you!
Shane: too late – already damned myself!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Shane: I see a ship in the Harbor. I can and shall Obey. But if it wasn’t for your misfortune, I’d be a heavnly person today.
Amy: but it is not Monday
Shane: <shrugs>
Amy: LOL….now I will have that damn song in my head all day!
Shane: glad I could help.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Shane: SHHHHHHHH!
Amy went idle at 10: 26: 07 AM
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
Shane: What up Dawg!?! Yo! Check it out…
Amy: woof woof
Thursday, October 02, 2008
Shane: The Turkeys are stalking me.
Amy: well it is about time….I told them to months ago!
Amy: stupid bird brains
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
Shane: I’m wearing a Sombrero!
Amy: Ole’
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Shane: Anteaters deserve the bulk of the peanut butter.
Amy: but sparrows leave the coins in flowers
Monday, October 13, 2008
Shane: Happiness is a warm gun
Amy: I’m so tired
Monday, October 20, 2008
Shane: In the belly of the Giant Whale – all the girls just wanna have fun. In the look of a frightened neighbor – In a big warm bed at night – In a broken elevator – In the teeth of a dog that bites.
Amy: that is where you will find my lost dreams and hopes of my childhood
Monday, October 27, 2008
Shane: Turkey farts smell like the moon
Amy: cheesey!
Shane: green cheesy?
Amy: yeah, old, dusty green cheesy
My Sappy Emotional Post
by Shane on Oct.08, 2008, under Rants
Throughout my life I have had trouble with friendships. Making them, keeping them and not sabotaging them has always been a significant challenge for me. While I am certain we have all struggled with this from time to time, I feel I’m particularly bad at the “Friendship Thing”. Have you ever had someone you consider your “Brother” move away and not tell you? Are you certain whenever the phone rings that it’s not for you? Simply because you can’t think of anyone who would bother calling you? In fact I write this note in a rather sleepy state due to this issue once-again popping into my head and allowing me much sleep. It’s not easy to sleep when I’m reliving all the friendships I’ve had blow-up, fade away, not reciprocate or others that just go to shit. The methods change, but the end result is typically me left with the only person who can stand to be around me; my dear Amber. My one truly successful friendship – and one I cherish endlessly. Well that’s not fair to those who still consider me a friend and tolerate my presence. Thank you, but I think that’s only because I’ve stayed far-enough away as to not drive you away yet. Give it time, I’ll find some way to unravel what loose threads exist between you and I.
In retrospect, it’s always me that does that damage. It’s always me that expects too much from those who loosely associate with me. I commit too much of myself in the unfair expectation that the commitment will be returned and unfortunately get upset, sad, depressed, defensive, when it’s not. Simply because I will do anything to help my friends, doesn’t I shouldn’t expect the same in return. In fact it’s completely wrong for me to think that. In the end, friendship means different things to different people. It’s not right or wrong – it’s just different. Friendships aren’t family – I get it intellectually, I just wish I’d get it emotionally.
So to those friends who have come into my life only to have me suffocate, smother, sabotage or simply fail to nuture our friendship, I’m sorry. Thank you for the time we had and I’m sorry for the time we don’t.
She Cheats… I live with it.
by Shane on Oct.06, 2008, under Project Say Something, Rants
Back when Noah was in Short-pants I asked set the PSS Theme of:
“If you caught you spouse cheating on you, would you forgive them and remain married?
What if it had been going on for years?
What if they continued after you caught them?”
Well – this is a rough one for me because it hit really close to home. My beloved spouse, Amber, has been cheating on me for years. I’m not talking about a mistake here or there… I’m talking about consistent patterns of cheating. So. I guess we are still married, so to answer the first part of the question. Yes, I’d stay married. Yes, even if it had been going on for years. As for catching her… She’s pretty smart about it. I’ve never directly caught her cheating one me, but all the pieces add up.
I can tell by the look on your stunned faces that you don’t believe me. What?! Amber cheating on Shane?! I don’t believe it! I know.. but its the truth! Let me explain. Every game we play, she totally kicks my ass. At Uno, I think she occasionally puts down 2 cards at a time. In Clue I think she marks the cards. When we play Hearts and / or Spades.. I’m totally lost. She cheats so bad I sometimes wonder what state I’m in. (Alaska, right?) Dont’ believe me still? Just try to play Tetris against her. You will never win.. ever. Never ever.. She’s such a big cheater!



